041: It’s a Party and I’ll Dance If I Want To
The woes of finding the perfect occasion dress
We can envision it in our mind’s eye and (as a shock to absolutely no one) it's perfect. The color is just right, the length is just right and it definitely has the proper amount of glitz & glamour. However, it happens to be irritatingly hard to find. Is the perfect dress a fairytale? An illusion? How can there be so many and yet nothing at all?
We, CM and AB, have been down a few rabbit holes to find the perfect occasion dress. Even if we haven’t found it yet (or have we?? Teehee), we can share the journey for your pure entertainment, or to help you skip the anguish of looking for gold at the end of the rainbow. We can also offer some affordable dresses, unaffordable inspo and how to find dresses that marry the two!
Dress to Impress
AB: I am always thankful to have a refrigerator full of invites (mostly weddings ofc) because having an invite means having the privilege to dress up. A luxury we often talk about not having enough of. Once that RSVP button is clicked the hunt is on for the look. The truth is, there are a million and five dresses to choose from making it seem like a simple task, but even if the dress is appealing at first glance there is always something just a little bit off about it. Sometimes it's clicking the next image and finding it looks nothing like you expected on an actual body. Or, especially when shopping secondhand, you can’t exactly pinpoint every detail about the dress because the photos are at the hand of any ol’ reseller. Dresses like this one! Such a fun and exciting pattern with intriguing beaded strap details, but what am I really getting here? The photo of it on a body isn't clear on the hemline and the seller didn't steam it (which makes me crazy)! If I am not 100%, I can’t commit! On the other end of the spectrum take this amazing Oscar De La Renta mini, it is what wedding guest dreams are made of! I immediately imagined it with a pair of colored tights, maybe pink, maybe a bold burgundy. However, one click over in the photos and the way it fits on a body isn’t working! BLASTED! Even a $4k dress can't make the cut.
CM: I consider myself a shopping expert and this stumped me to the point of lunacy this year. I love to get dolled up and am perfectly comfortable being overdressed for a dressy occasion—a frequent occurrence in Montana tbh. I have a stock of imagery on Pinterest that exists for the sole purpose of fancy-adjacent needs. Sometimes I will literally do a Google image search but that often leads to disappointment, because the prices of my dream dresses on Pinterest are $500+ designer pieces, so I start with what I know: Reformation. Shocker, I know. If I find something I like I rarely click add-to-cart, I usually pivot and head to Depop or Poshmark for some secondhand steals because I can almost always find what I’m looking for, or something similar, with tags, and for half the price. Some tips of note: the reason this works for me is because I am very comfortable with Reformation sizing since I shop the brand so frequently so I’m not scared to buy thrifted.
CM: That being said, I’ve been let down a few times and have really tested my skills in the wild west. If I don’t like what I see then I legitimately just head back to Google because—whether you like it or not—Google knows you pretty well. There are some mainstay spots to hit: Revolve, Anthropologie, Free People, Nordstrom, ASOS, but you never know what might turn up. In my searching I found some affordable top hits on Abercrombie & Fitch and Zara AND Saks Fifth Avenue (crazy, I know). The proof is in the pudding below.
AB: I am a dreamer and am here to share those dreams in the form of a dress. I need something in my ensembles that are unexpected. Unfortunately, at times, that little bit of extra whimsy comes with a price tag. Some of these are for the dreams while the next picks are a little closer to earth.
AB: However, I would never leave y'all completely starstruck and empty handed. I found just as many winners in the secondhand world, and a more wallet friendly few. Finders keepers though!!
CM: I’d argue you could throw a chiffon scarf in a complementary color with at least 50% of these to dress them up further (or any existing dress you love at home). Clearly, I have a color palette……
Honorable Mentions
CM: I’m getting married (!!!!!!) and that comes with its own shopping woes, but I’m trying to find fits that I genuinely love and can wear again. As such, I’m thinking outside of the box. Arguments can easily be made for going all-white all the time—it is the only time in your life you’ll be doing so—but I’m a fancy b*&#@ and if I’m going to wear a fancy dress it will have to be a multi-occasion situation.
CM: I’ve scoured the interwebs’ secondhand stores for the all-white options, but unfortunately have only found a few that were close to my vibe. I was really inspired by the above Self-Portrait dress and leaning into the ‘something blue’ of being a bride, but just couldn’t possibly justify that price tag when I’ve already bought a very expensive gown. I considered this Amanda Uprichard Romper but it just couldn’t add up to the Self-Portrait dress. I envisioned sheer elbow-length gloves and the epitome of elegance.
CM: I’ll let you in on a secret, I completely went off script and found a dress that just hit me in the CHEST when I saw it. It’s nothing like the above choices I was considering, but it is 100% me. And isn’t that really the story we’re trying to tell here? Just pick you.
AB: I love the idea of an afterparty dress. It is unnecessary, but I am a Leo queen who loves fashion, so an outfit change is a must for me . If I did it again (and was a baller) I would pick a heavily structured mini! Like so. Or I would go off script completely and go darker, but still very center of attention like so (so so lively!).
Deep Cuts
CM: I’m not a Zara girlie, but I will say, if you’re a bride-to-be, they have some choice selections. This silk dress among them. And if you see me in these slingbacks, no you didn’t.
CM: If you’re looking to invest in a couple of occasion dresses, Tanya Taylor surprised the heck out of me. Could someone buy this buttery number? Staud also has some yummy choices, like this.
AB: Speaking of investing, it's not for my skin tone, but for those of you out there that are the perfect pale, check out this Khaite beauty. Insane.
CM: I was really dreaming in the thousands this week, this Prada skirt is no exception.
AB: In my searches for dresses I sure did come across some pause-worthy shoes!! Especially loved these Loewe coded vintage beaded kittens.
CM: I didn’t dress for any occasions, but I did have some seriously springy fits this week.
Before You Go
CM: If you have any shopping woes or queries, we’d love to hear ‘em. Idk about you caterpillars but I’m ready to be a butterfly every time I get dressed—whether it’s on the calendar or not.
AB: I put away my winter closet and brought out my Spring/Summer tuckaways! To my surprise, I had so many dresses awaiting events. Remember to switch your closets when the weather permits! It has more treasures than you think!
Mark your calendar! Ciao for now. xx